I Need Another Story

Unbelievable! I’ve been spending almost 5 months relaxing at work. Jam sibuk gw tiap hari adalah dari jam 08.30 pagi sampai jam 11.30 pagi dan hampir bisa dipastikan setelah jam makan siang gw bisa browsing browsing sampe pegel..hihihi *klik klik klik!*

Tetapi ada saatnya sih sehari bisa kirim 3 sampai 4 reports ke mailing list yg terdiri dari 2360 email addresses. But of course I’m equipped with an email system called Atomic Mail yang bisa ngirim sekaligus ke 500 emails sekali send *wohooo!*.

Anyway my smooth sailing life at work akhirnya menyebabkan gw jarang bisa meng-update blog ini dengan cerita cerita boss psycho. Sebenernya ada sih beberapa insiden aneh yang gw alami di kantor baru tapiiii sepertinya gw udah kebal hehehe. Sehingga gw belom merasa perlu menuliskannya di blog ini. Ibarat laler masih bisa gw keplak. *plakk!*

So friends..kali ini gw masih akan menceritakan kisah sedih di kantor lama yaitu ratapan anak pungut: Mbak Mini.

Ceritanya sepeninggal gw lima bulan yang lalu, Pak Boss Besar mulai panik karena setelah sebulan lebih melalui proses rekrutmen belum ada satupun kandidat yang sreg di hatinya. Ehem...ya gimana ya Pih emang gw itu tak tergantikan sih! (nyengir narsis).

Maka Pak Manajer mencoba untuk memberikan solusi (setelah berdiskusi dgn gw di suatu sore), yaitu mengangkat Mbak Mini sebagai Office Administrator yang baru dan kemudian merekrut Sekretaris Junior untuk membantu kerja Mbak Mini. Akhirnya Papih pun menerima ide tersebut dengan syarat:

1. Mbak Mini menjabat posisi Office Administrator dengan masa percobaan tiga bulan (buset deh karyawan lama aja masih ada probationary period)
2. Setelah masa percobaan lewat akan ada review/assesment apakah Mbak Mini cocok menjabat posisi tersebut 
3. Jika ndak cocok maka Mbak Mini akan kembali menjabat posisi sekretaris dan mereka akan merekrut Office Manager baru

Berita buruk itu datang di suatu sore ketika gw sedang bernyengnyong ria bersama sahabat gw, Agnes. Tiba-tiba terima BBM berbunyi: Satu lagi monyet tertipuuu! (icon nangis sesenggukan)

Nggak lama Mbak Mini pun menelpon gw...

Mini: Ternyata setelah tiga bulan aku nggak lolos masa percobaan

Gw: Hah? Kok bisa?

Mini: Ya bisalah..Papih merasa aku belom mampu menjadi Office Admin yg baru

Gw: Oooh

Mini: Dan selama ini aku nggak ada salary adjustment padahal kan aku udah mengerjakan kerjaannya.

Kebayang sih gimana kecewanya Mbak Mini...tapi knowing si Papih yg perfeksionis dan nyebelin abis, kemungkinan buruk begini bisa aja terjadi. Gw yakin banget kalau Mbak Mini udah berusaha maksimal tapi mungkin belum cukup maksimal di mata Papih. Mungkin belum cukup berdarah darah seperti gw dulu (halah!).

Kasian Mbak Mini..yang sabar ya. Nggak ada saran lain dari gw sih selain mulai mencari cari kerjaan baru. Apalagi sekarang yang jadi boss Admin adalah Nenek Gerondong. Iiiih amit amit! *ketok ketok meja* Sumpah deh gw kalo inget inget kejadian dulu jadi rada nyesel kenapa nggak gw voodoo aja tu orang. Hust!***

KALI INI HANYA JADI PENDENGAR

Setiap hari sejak tiga bulan yang lalu, langkah kaki gw terasa ringan mau berangkat ke kantor. I’m having happy feet everyday, its a feeling that I’ve lost a couple of years ago. Mimpi buruk itu bermula sejak kedatangan si Nenek Gerondong (jeng..jeng!)

Dia itu ibarat Freddy Krueger, baik dalam alam mimpi maupun alam nyata bisa sama-sama bikin orang mati berdiri. Makanya setelah selama 1.5 tahun gw diteror dengan berbagai mimpi buruk akhirnya gw bisa mengakhiri episode horror itu dengan pindah kerja (syukur Alhamdulillah).

Tapi nggak demikian dengan mbak Minie. Masih inget kan, my assistant in the University of Melancholy? Dia masih terperangkap di situ ibarat burung dalam sangkar emas. Kenapa gw bilang sangkar emas? Karena jujur aja kemasannya sangat indah dan mahal: fancy chocolates, designer’s bag and fine wines. I kinda missed those things hehehe...

Anyway mbak Mini curhat tadi pagi kalau Nenek Gerondong makin menjadi jadi. Beginilah kisahnya:

Dua minggu yang lalu, mbak Mini udah mengajukan THR karyawan karena sesuai peraturan undang-undang kudu dibayarkan 2 minggu sebelum lebaran atau minimal 1 minggu sebelum lebaran.

Kemarin pagi, amplop yg ditunggu tunggu pun datang yaitu kiriman cheques dari head office. Namun betapa terkejutnya mbak Mini *bzzzt!* (bagai disambar gledek), nggak ada satu pun cheque pembayaran THR di dalamnya hanya ada cheque untuk pembayaran ke supplier.

Panik? Ya of course dong cyiiin...bisa didemo sama pak OB dan pak Sopir lah! Mbak Minie pun mencoba menghubungi kantor pusat (Mayday! Mayday!) tapi malah disambut dengan sambaran gledek yang kedua: Olip (asisten Nenek Gerondong) lagi block leave alias cuti seminggu penuh.

Nah lho? Mbak Mini pun berusaha menghubungi Nenek Gerondong yang dengan konsisten menolak mengangkat telpon. Saran gw sih, mungkin sekali sekali mesti dicoba ngirim sinyal lewat mbah dukun Ki Joko Bodo biar berasa dikit tusukan tusukan jarum gaib di kepala Nenek Gerondong. Kali aja jadi bener..heh..heh..heh (tertawa terkekeh)

Entah gimana akhirnya Nenek Gerondong memberikan penjelasan secara tidak jelas bahwa hari ini baru akan ditransfer pembayaran THR nya ke rekening masing-masing. Lega? Eits nanti dulu! Dengan catatan menunggu si Papih bangun bobo’ secara dia lagi berlibur ke Perancis dan hak mutlak untuk melakukan transfer via internet banking ada di tangan Papih (pingsan celentang)***

Just Another Stupid Story

It seems that the recent update on Nyazarudin’s high profile case will end up anti-climax. I’m sure some of the readers has predicted this will happen but of course not ASAP (As Soon As Possible). Yep..be prepared for a super huge dissapointment.

The Committee of Wizard Corruption Watch (“WCW”) is caught by surprised by Nyazarudin’s sudden change in attitude. He requested to be punished immediately without further investigation. Nyazarudin also pleaded to the committee to protect his wife and children from harm. He has appointed his lawyer, Oswald, shall be their safe-keeper.

“This new development has caught us off guard,” said the Head of Investigator.”This U-turn is a surprised to all of us here. We’re also not sure why.”

Look dude, who are you trying to kid? It’s obvious that Nyazarudin does not trust justice in this country. His life is endangered and so does his family. OR maybe they did the Obliviate spell towards him which makes him “forget”.

Alas, the summary of this whole news are:

1.       We have no choice but to trust the stupid authorities

2.       They have caught a stupid criminal

3.       This is going to be another stupid story

Case closed?***

The Case of The Whistle Blower

Nyazaruddin, the young politician wizard, is still making headlines in the news all over the country. Climbing steadily in the Most Wanted chart, he is now the numero uno of the week. (applause!)

Despite his good looking and calm demeanor, we have yet to discover his darker side of personality. Rumours whirls around the block that he was planning to crushed (literally) Sir Hamsley, one of the Chairman in the Wizard Corruption Watch (“WCW”). The plan was spilled in one of the Ethical Committee of Wizardry (“ECW”) hearings, based on a conversation recorded between Nyazaruddin and his muggle worker, Abe.

“Get someone to beat the hell out of that b*stard Hamsley!” (hissing sound) “Make him feel sorry that he was ever born!”(hissing again) “It will teach him a lesson not to messed up with me.”

“But sir..this is mad” Abe timidly answered

“I’m willing to pay billions of galeon! How mad is that?” Hahaha....(evil laughter)

But of course, this rumour has yet to be confirmed by the Aurors. (So don’t get too excited readers).

Prior to his capture in Colombia, he was in contact with one of the muggle television station using telephonic video. During the connection, he’s threatening everyone in his political party that he will blow-the-whistle as a payback. “I have all the evidence here in this hocrux.”

Hmmm it seems that almost everybody in his party are dirrrtyyy. This makes us wonder if the picture includes their leader, “He-Who-Knows-So-Well”.

And now that Nyazarudin is back in  the country, his only life warranty may only be the hocrux. But where is the hocrux now? Another mystery for the Aurors to dig. Stay tune***

NYAZARUDIN in HARRY POTTER 7 3/4

Saturday, 13 August. The Wizard Corruption Watch has successfully returned the lost boy, Nyazarudin, back to Awkwarts. They wanted to ensure his safetiness by chartering a private PortKey (PK 123456). Muggles & wizards are buzzing at the airport waiting for Nyazarudin arrival which is said to be guarded by a couple of Dementors wearing black masks.

"What's going to be Nyazarudin fate?" ask a reporter

"His life is in danger but they are not gonna do it in public" said a spectator

"What will happen do you think?" ask the reporter again

"They would probably sell to us the story that Nyazarudin tried to escape Azkaban and they have no choice but to stop him with the Avadakadavra spell" another said

"Oh dear that's horrible!" exclaimed the reporter. "But wonder where is his wife now? Didn't see her around"

"She maybe wearing the invisible cloak, keeping the last hocrux away from the Ministry of (Unlawful) Magic. The key is in the hocrux unless they can extract Nyazarudin's memory into the pensieve"

"Can't they use a veritaserum?"

"The serum are out of stock a long time ago. Besides it never worked to extract the truth from all previous corruptors!" (shrug)

Up to this minute speculations are still hanging across the country. How will this story end? Stay tune in the next report***

Sometimes (Just Sometimes)

Heeeyyy friends, how have you guys been? Nggak terasa udah 3 x gajian nih di kantor baru dan Alhamdulillah nggak pernah telat! Hehehehe

Gw sekarang gawe di perusahaan Securities House (sekuritas) based in Malaysia,a join venture with an Indonesian entity. The total employees in Jakarta is about 150 staff..wooo bandingkan waktu dulu gw kerja dengan suasana 4L (Lu Lagi Lu Lagi) *ooeekkss*

I’m the admin support & coordinator in the research division, my main responsibilities are sending research reports to clients, replying to their queries on the reports, arranging company visit and plant visit. I don’t do rubbish works that I’m not paid for hahaha...

So far I get along well with everybody in the new work place. My bosses are nice and so are my colleagues. Every month we had a gathering between the Institutional Sales and Research Dept, either eating out or karaoke night. It’s fun!

But sometimes (just sometimes) I do missed the fine chocolates and good wines that my ex-boss used to share. Usually around this time of year he would return from his summer holiday in France and brought me a box of chocolates in a fancy box *oo la la* ^ _ ^ He would bought small souvenirs too adding to my souvenir collections.

Raju (my ex-colleague) saw my status update on FB and asked “Are you signalling something?” hahaha...No laaaa. I just missed the chocolates and wines. Nothing else. No regrets in everything that’s going on in my life. Its  a story line that will keep on growing until the end.

Anyway so sorry I’ve not been updating this page. Karena pada dasarnya inti gw nulis di sini adalah untuk curhat. Berhubung udah nggak ada hal yang mengerikan lagi untuk diceritakan..mungkin gw akan ganti content nya dengan cerita horror aja kali yah? Hihihi***

FINALE BENERAN

Hey friends nggak terasa udah hampir sebulan gw nggak posting cerita di blog. Banyak hal yang terjadi sih yang baik maupun yang buruk (mostly the bad things) tapi rasanya gw udah nggak terlalu perduli juga. Alias its not going to be my problem anymore whatever it is hahaha *tertawa bebas*

And so ini adalah hari terakhir gw pentas di perusahaan ini. Frankly, I don't get any applause nor standing ovation from Pak Manajer, Pak Boss Ketjil dan Nenek Gerondong. Bahkan email tanda terimakasih gw pun tak di jawab. Ah ya sudahlah...bagi gw yang penting Pak Boss Besar (my Papih) dan Mr. Balaram reply email gw dengan sungguh-sungguh. If you don't mind I'd like to share their notes:

My Papih said:

Thank you for your farewell note. I would love to stake a claim some credit for the wonderful person that you are-thoughtful, caring, poise, smart, humorous and professional-but I will have to admit that is all due to the good values imparted by your family and your strong sense of self and desire for personal development. We will miss you very much and your absence will be felt by all

*hiks..terharu gw jadinya*

Mr. Balaram said:

Thanks for especially remembering me in your farewell message. It means much to me and I will cherish it. And yes, at least between you and me, this is certainly not the end. I value your friendship. All the best to you in your career and family.

*thank you Pak*

Nggak terasa udah hampir jam 4 sore..gw pun sudah selesai mengosongkan laci dan kolong meja dari benda-benda tak berguna. I've packed all my personal belongings into one big travel bag and two carton boxes. My fourteen years stuffs:

Until we meet again my friends probably in my next adventure in the corporate world. As I said to my Papih and Mr. Balaram in my farewell note "Friends will always remain as friends no matter where we are".****